Confidence is innate—but it can be faked. According to body language expert and Caress ambassador Tonya Reiman, there are certain things you can do to convey that you’re a girl boss—even if you’re feeling the complete opposite. Got a big presentation coming up? How about just a Tinder date with the guy you’ve been witty-bantering with for weeks? Either way, we think you’ll find the following information quite interesting. We suggest you uncross your arms, stat.
Keep scrolling to find out how to appear more confident!
When it comes to a dead giveaway of nerves, Reiman says that you can if tell someone is feeling tense by their face. “A furrowed brow, clenched teeth, and a lowered chin can be signs that confidence is lacking,” she says. Next time you’re feeling particularly anxious but don’t want to show it, pay attention to your face—take a depth breath and try to relax your facial expression. Reiman says short, shallow breathing—usually couples with an occasion deep breath, which signals the person’s need to quell their nerves—is also a giveaway of anxiety.
This one is obvious. “Typically, individuals who are lacking confidence will slouch over, shoulders forward,” Reiman says. “We unconsciously slouch in order to become smaller and less noticeable.” To convey that you are comfortable in your own skin, stand tall and make sure your hands are turned down. Why? Turning your hands up can be interpreted as a submissive sign, according to Reiman. “It’s a given that good posture communicates confidence and it’s the first thing you notice about a person, but did you know that it can actually make you feel better?” Reiman says. “When you sit or stand tall, more oxygen is released to the brain, which in turn makes you feel healthier, livelier and rids the body of toxins.” So, win-win.
Never underestimate the power of a smile. Reiman says that smiling actually communicates confidence and makes you more attractive. “Seeing someone else smile causes a chemical reaction that decreases stress and boosts ‘feel good’ transmitters in the brain,” she explains. “It’s contagious and others can’t help but smile back, so you benefit from the same positive effects.”
In a more intimate setting, like a date, where you want to convey confidence but also come across as your most attractive self, Reiman recommends maintaining eye contact, leaning in while you’re talking, pointing your feed towards your date, and tilting your head towards the left, which she says makes you appear more attractive. On the flip side, tilting your head to the right signals that you are trustworthy—something to keep in mind for your next job interview, no?
At the end of the day, invisible cues can be as strong as visible ones. Reiman says that scent is a major factor in attraction, and can instantly make you feel more confident, too. “Notes such as vanilla, amber, sandalwood, and musk can actually enhance any other fragrance that you wear,” she says. She recommends creating a base for your scent starting in the shower, with a fragrance body wash, like Caress Love Forever Body Wash ($4); finish with a spritz of Elizabeth & James Nirvana Black ($80) and you’ll be good to go.
Have you heard of any of these body language tips? Speaking of invisible cues, here are 12 cozy fall fragrances you’ll love.